• AC

Mindset over motivation!

People often ask how do I stay motivated to wake up at 5am, to keep overcoming these medical obstacles, to go after my dreams... you get the idea. My answer is always frustrating for everyone, "I don't!". There is literally no amount of motivational anything that makes me want to do any of that. I have a naturally pessimistic mindset and every day is a challenge to be positive. Not just positive, but positive and productive, kind, useful, creative, happy, etc. This mind is something else. 🤪

And I have heard all of the... "wake up at 5am to be successful, go to bed early, listen to motivational podcasts instead of music... etc."! And if you are unable to do these things you do not want it bad enough! Does that ever feel motivational to you? It has never felt motivational to me and it is insanely discouraging and damaging to ones mental health. This is why we are all searching for "motivation" all the time!

Guess what?!

We are all different and things that help me might not help you. Some people THRIVE at 5am and others at 8 and 9pm. Some people get motivated by music and others by podcasts. There are so many different coaches out there with different tactics that have helped others become successful. If they have different tactics how do they all work? Because we all have different personalities and different things resonate with each of us differently. Life is not one size fits all and it's odd that we attempt to make it so!

Story time!

About two years ago I started out on this journey to find my purpose. My life just changed drastically and so had my desires and passions. Well, I found myself searching for community and like-minded individuals. But... what "minded" was I? I was lost and confused. Not sure what I wanted to do with my life, shedding friends left and right as my life changed, attempting to find out who this new Amanda was. How could I know what my mindset was? So, I searched for ladies that were building businesses and BOOM! Found a few different communities and decided to attach myself to one in particular and loved it.

Everyone seemed to be very supportive, uplifting, and helpful. It was great to feel like I was finding my purpose. Then the overwhelming feelings started to kick in. It always felt like no matter what I was doing, it wasn't enough. Wake up at 5am, participate in the group chat as much as possible, post on my stories every hour, post on social media daily, share this, share that, do this, do that, be on this call and that call. It felt like if you weren't on something, "you didn't want it bad enough"!

I don't think people say these things to intentionally make one feel down or like they are garbage. Honestly, I think they feel like they are being motivational and for some it does light a temporary fire under their ass... and then it burns out quickly. That energy is gone and so is the motivation and then we fall right back into old habits.

Don't worry, you aren't helpless!

What helped me was understanding that motivation was fleeting and I needed more. So, I went on the hunt. Found spirituality, yoga, card pulling, crystals, tapping and mindset work. All kinds of mindset work. FINALLY, something that resonated with me. Something that made me excited to schedule into my daily activities. At one point I thought, "this must be what these people are talking about. That want to listen to a podcast over music, but it's doing mindset instead of Eminem or Chevelle. Hell yeah!" We still have Em or Chevelle rocking in the house most of the day, though. Music keeps my headspace happy!

Let's start with the basics...

and small! This is how you make changes sustainable, you do them small and one step at a time. Focusing on growing from an obligation to an opportunity mindset. Living with an invisible illness makes it very easy to live with an obligation mindset and that keeps me, and others, from pursuing and achieving our dreams! It is as simple as changing, "every day I have to find away to work around this brain fog" to "every day I get to find a way..."

As I am typing this my brain is so congested still from the seizure on Friday and the fact that my body is ridding itself of this fish oil, so typing this blog post is an absolute challenge, and I have been at it for about 2 hours now. BUT, I get to fumble through this post and publish it to the best of my brain's ability today AND that is a damn blessing!

Once you pop you just can't stop!

Mindset work is like that, it's almost like a ripple effect. (And now I want chips) Instead of looking at epilepsy and a TBI as obligations and looking at the obstacles they add to my daily life as opportunities has led me naturally to a gratitude mindset. When I say "I get to overcome this insane brain fog", I really mean, "I am still alive to spend time with my family and help others achieve their health + wellness goals"! Y'all, I'm alive and I shouldn't be! Saying "I get to" reminds me of that all the time and does make it easier to overcome obstacles. Now, everyone might not have something that traumatic to be grateful for, but we all have things to be grateful for!

There are several different mindset courses, YouTube videos, challenges, coaches out there for you to be able to find the ones that resonate with you. We just started Mel Robbins #MindsetReset challenge she released in 2019. It's on YouTube and her website and still very relevant. We watch the daily videos from Alux on YouTube. They are short clips that give tips on how to become successful. We also just started working on changing from a limited to an abundance mindset.

None of this work will matter if we do not apply the knowledge we learn! Don't forget that part! 🤪

To wrap up, since my brain is scattered! If you are someone who has struggled to wakeup at 5am, go to sleep earlier, get the workout in, start that side business, choose the podcast over music, etc. Look at your mindset instead of being on an endless search for motivation. Motivation leaves you, that's why you are always searching for it! Work on changing your mindset. You will need to figure out what your mindset issue is... are you fixed and you want a growth mindset? Do you have a negative and you want a positive? Do you have a limited and you want abundant? It's important to know what you would like to correct so you know what type of work to do.

Remember, life is not one size fits all! Happy #MindsetMonday! 🖤

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